Fireflies

Fourways clicking, flashing as the gentle night caresses me.
Broken heart once more but all that is left is devoured
by hungry demons that live in the empty places.
I’m sorry mom, but the menthol cigarettes
will always remind me of the home I made
out of my confusion and their acceptance.
I’m sorry mom, but I can’t put down the destruction
just yet when the flame and the smoke taste like
laughter and the marks left by chains
no longer on my wrists.

The sky drips from blue into black,
my own bruised and echoing cathedral
made out of the bones that caged
in my aching lungs,
where there once were dreams but now
all thats left is a quiet whisper of a life
I’m not too damn sure I want to keep living.

Fireflies emanate a soft yellow glow around me
and I want to believe in beautiful things happening
but beautiful things have no substance now,
they don’t get to stay very long now.
Loving only leads to loss and someone once said
that it’s all just growing pains
but when does the growing stop?